Inpatient at Shepard Pratt Schizophrenic Rant

11/14/13 Day 1

Written while waiting on admission:

So I’m in this atrium like a cul-de-sac but it’s hospital
rooms instead of houses and James lives in #3 on the
end and he has CP or something he walks bowlegged and screams
and yells instead of talking and he laughs at his own jokes and
I wish I could understand what he’s trying to say cause
I need a good laugh right now because its been a while
and Nurse Jackie apologizes because he keeps coming over to
look behind my curtain and he scared me at first but
I smiled at him and he woulda smiled back
if he could and then I started to understand some of
the things he was saying and at 6 o’clock he reminds her
it’s dinnertime and at 6:30 he wants ice cream
but he didn’t eat all his green beans and it
makes me smile and my life is fucking falling apart
because I’m about to be admitted to a mental hospital
and for a minute- all I can think about is
that weird fucking clock on the wall that’s taunting me because
the numbers are turned sideways along the edge of the circle and
@4 and 10 the numbers flip and I notice that dude in
room #2 kinda looks like my favorite ex and
in that moment while waiting to be admitted to a mental hospital
all I can think about is fucking that dude in room #2-
and the obviously insane fucking person
that would make such a God-forsaken fucking clock.

-Jesse Haydn

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